Having an illness, a disease, or a disability naturally causes a lot of problems. There are primary obstacles: things that are foremost in your fight against your own body. Physical and emotional pain, awful confusion, all the stages of grief... All things I've subtly (or not so subtly) experienced and battled these past six months. And then there are the secondary complications that, somehow, make the whole thing worse.
Isolation. Physical, emotional, and spiritual atrophy. Blow-ups with family or friends who don't understand. Being thrown so far from what you thought was your path you are trapped in the bramble bushes. Fear that you are making costly, irreparable mistakes about your care, your family, your future so you take the cowards way out and decide not to decide.
2013. I'll be spending New Year's Eve with my husband and some friends. I hope you all ring in the New Year with loved ones, happiness and hope for the future.
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